12.12.2009 // 12 December 2009

my 3rd and 4th sis wedd. <3

hey, hello, hyee. (:

ohh, im fucking damn tiredd. jab jab jab, acc post nieh khas buat "my relatives". na buat karangan sket pasal mereka mereka ini.

My So BIG Family.

did i have it? hmm, let me think firstt. humm. TAKDE kott. when i was a young girl, i always dream to have a very close cousin. and it never come to reality. hahaha. i dun have it, till the end of the day maybe, bcause setakat nie pun, i dun have one. sometime i felt lyk, we dun have anyone to rely on. we dont have strong relationship among each other. kadang kadang, people always mcm pelik when our family buat kenduri kenduri kan. theres no other people there to help us, especially my big big family. should i call as family? goshh. please lah. sangatlah annoying bile they gve excuses yang macam haram ahh. they say, we all girls. na tolong ape lagi? statement tu sangat lah annoying dan haram je. takan la ktorg larat na buat evrything alone? tolong lah fikir sket, we dun need ur BIG help. kadang kadang small things pn ktorg hargai sangat sebab tade orang na tolong ktorg. yang mereka mereka ini, datang makan gossip balik. tu je. yang perempuan belambak sangat nie la buat segale kerje. angkat meje, angkat lauk, susun pinggan, angkat carpet. sapu laman sapu carpet, sapu lantai, cuci segale cuci. tade orang pun kesa. Alhamdulillah we all not so girly, and eww. we can do it alone. without thier help dengan jaye nye. kadang kadang i wondering why this happen, it is because we dun do it in the others? i admit im not someone who are rajen to help someone especially bab bab memasak. macam mane luna na lend my hand if satu haram pun luna tatao na buat, cne na tolong? ntah lah. mybe memang salah luna kot. hee, ntah lah. macam tadi, my so BIG family datang with the others. bukan awal. seorang manusie pun tade kat uma luna. macam bkan na buat wedd pun. memang la katering, but sometime tunjuk muke pun da Alhamdulillah. u didnt do it at all. it is my family is too sombong? are we? when i think about this kemusnahan kan, i cried. memang bodoh nanges pasal nieh. but, if one day evrythings its not same as today? mcm mane if evrythings semua berantakan hancur. bergaduh sini sane, bermusuh sini sane, mengumpat sini sane, menfitnah sini sane? i dun know who am i gonna rely on if this happen. i always pray, this things never ever happen. if ade orang yang one day akan cetuskan. tolong lah bertaubat. tak tengok ke macam mane orang suffer bcause of world war 2. ape punce nye? tak bersatu. hisyh. luna pelik, tapi i know, they all doesnt feel lyk me. they never ever care. for them, we are nothing, mybe bcause we have nothing? ntah lah. pelik lah manusie nieh. tadi sape je tolong ktorg. well, let me make a list. i mean SHORT list.

a) Pak Su' Family.

b) Mahadir's Family.

c) Abang Udin.

d) Pakcik Zamri.

can you believe it? okai, let me tell you. my father's punye adek beradek = 7, my mother's = 4. okaiii. fine. susa la nak cakap, but fyi, my dad's family is so BIG. seriously ramai. but yang tolong nye? i cant see anyone yang sukerele lend their hand. im so tired. please lah, can i have the wish that i always wish when i was a little girl? its not and never be too late.

today notes ; ade ubi ade batas, ade hari saye balas. >:)

iwishiknowyoubetter,

lunasayang